For context: One of the rules in that community is that you aren’t allowed to post anything related to suicide. In a mental health community.

  • Phoebe@feddit.de
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    1 year ago

    This is so true.

    I had 2 therapies in my life but it never felt that helpfull. Yes, to give me a kind of stability and helped me to not felt into the dark. But i always felt under presure, when it comes to my asexuality (it’s just ‘trauma’). Or when i didn’t want to participate in ttrpg anymore cause the german geek community is sexist as fuq.

    I always felt that i would go crazy and that my fears are not real. That hurted so much and had delayed my “healing” unnecessary. Only when i found a partner to speak openly and when i connected to people dealing with the same stuff, i realized, that i wasn’t alone.

    I learned about adhd in women and how east germany had abused psychiatry (cause my stepdad was a refugee from there)… i’ve always believed in psychology, but right now my “believe” is shattered. How can people think, they know more than their patients? Know better how to treat them?

    I am glad there are people seeing the same issues. That there is a name to it. It makes me feel more empowered. Thank you.

    • DessertStorms@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      Fellow ace, and late diagnosed neurodivergent (autistic) woman here 👋
      Funny how in a comment about finding your people you find your people haha

      I’ve felt much of the same things you describe, never even got to the point where anyone recognised any trauma (and there is much), they just kept telling me it was my fault and to “just be normal”.

      I no longer seek therapy because I had so many bad experiences, and I actually need it, but the process of finding someone that really “gets it” is impossible for me right now.

      I think the best many of us can do is try to surround ourselves with likeminded people, who might not be trained, but can at least validate our feelings in that we aren’t “going crazy” - the world really is going to shit and there is exploitation and oppression everywhere, and our reaction is perfectly normal, and that if we do actually have a mental illness, are able to be supportive and loving and accepting of us, which is massively important in treating mental illness anyway (and what so so many people lack). And if not possible irl, then online is perfectly valid too.

      It isn’t just you.

      • Phoebe@feddit.de
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        1 year ago

        What a beatiful, beatiful coincidence! Hello, fellow ace! 😊

        You are damn right! We need more diversity, more voices like ours. To shape the psychology-landscape and to help people find acceptance/validation. Most of all, we need to talk. Openly, kindly, caring.

        In my country, every group of people is gossip about each other. Stereotypes, prejudice… it was always frustrating dealing with that. Not other people are destroing our way of life, but we are. With the hate we uphold.

        The rising right wing movement is pretty scary. I am worried about the future of my country, the Internet itself. But the queer community will always find a way.

        • DessertStorms@kbin.social
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          1 year ago

          It really is!

          And I completely agree, diversity is the most basic step we generally need to take in society to increase chances of equity and equality. In the disability world we say “nothing about us without us” and that should really apply to all marginalised groups!

          If it helps at all we have the same kind of gossip and bigotry here in the UK, it’s really frustrating because to many people it’s just like their every day chit chat, they don’t care who can hear them, and that applies both in areal life and online, just no consideration or understanding that maybe words (and actions that aren’t directly seen as harmful) can in fact cause harm.

          I also agree about the queer community, along with other marginalised groups, when we stick together we are more powerful, we can’t forget that!

          • Phoebe@feddit.de
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            1 year ago

            I agree with you 😊

            Even tho i studied history, it took long to find topics like disability history, gender studies, science studies and… everything PoC are doing. Established Professionals downplayed all of these as not relevant. Not scientific enough. As a young professionell, you don’t want to ruin your reputation, so you don’t engage with that.

            In my country you are told, not to drift away from society. Not to built up your own ‘reality’, cause you read… a feministic book.

            These gashlight tactics had keep me from enganging with topics and communitys, which are interessting for me. I did not want to be outcasted. But now i feel more confidend.

            I want to dive into the neurodiverse community, cause it is such a new perspective in dealing with ones own life. Much more empowering! Much more brave. Learning to live with stuff like high sensitivity, instead of forcing myself to overcome it. It’s changing how i fre myself.

            And yeah: how people talk to each all over the world has changed. To devide us is an easy way to controll us. 10 years ago you couldn’t say that out loud (ya soundes paranoid) but since the facebook papers it has become more much more clearer. It’s a tool to undermine democraty. And a lot of people are stepping in that trap.