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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: August 5th, 2023

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  • Pretty similar experience to what others have mentioned, so mostly echoing what they said.

    With a shutdown I “hit the wall” so to speak. I could have been fine when things started out but I have reached the point where whatever it is has built up and I have reached my limit of overstimulation. I will stop participating in conversation, if it’s really bad I won’t even move much or be paying attention.

    Because I grew up with “you’re not autistic you’re just high maintenance” parents I learned to “save” my meltdowns. I may have short responses or act annoyed when I’m around others. Inside I am raging. And I know I’m raging for no reason aside from the environment, but I can’t help it. Which makes me more mad lol. Overstimulation is not just “wow it’s loud in here” it’s physically painful to me to continue to exist in that environment. Once I get home I rage cry.

    Another thing that can make me shutdown or have meltdowns is plans changing, not only overstimulation. When I have plans it is like my entire life leading up to that point is built on the fact that I will be doing X at Y time. I have spent the time to mentally prepare myself to do X at Y time. If those things change, everything feels fucked up.

    Recognizing when I am becoming overstimulated helps me a lot now that I actually understand what is happening. If I get to take a break and go for a walk or go somewhere quiet it usually prevents me from having a full on meltdown later. Also just… Admitting what is happening. Like “I am angry because the time changed from 3pm to 5pm and I was not mentally prepared for that.” But some situations are just too much and it ends up happening anyway.







  • I used to be fat, and when I watch morbidly obese people talk about how much they love food and it makes them happy and makes them feel better that is 100% me. Food is absolutely an addiction for some people, including me. Thankfully I have it under control to be at a healthy weight and lose weight when I need to, but some of these people have absolutely tragic childhoods or life experiences and I don’t blame them at all for coping in that way. I could 100% see myself in that position if I had been through what they have been through.

    However, those people are self aware that they are unhealthy. The people I can’t stand are the “healthy at every size” fat acceptance people. Healthy at every size was SUPPOSED to be that you can make positive health focused changes at any size and there is no point of no return. But it got twisted into I can be morbidly obese and I am still 100% healthy forever. And they even make people feel bad for wanting to lose weight, even if it’s for health reasons. Those people are trash and fall on the same level as antivax people IMO.

    Everyone deserves to be treated with respect, until you start spewing harmful bullshit and then I will judge you as much as I want.