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Cake day: July 6th, 2023

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  • UmeU@lemmy.worldto196@lemmy.blahaj.zoneAutocorrect Rule
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    21 days ago

    First suggestion:

    Women are the most vulnerable in the world and the most vulnerable are the most affected by the disease and the most likely to be affected by it is the people who are affected by it

    Middle suggestion:

    Women are not allowed in this world anymore because of their own personal preferences







  • My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re ugly too.

    Boy am I ugly. I’m so ugly that when I was born the doctor slapped my mother.

    My mother, she wouldn’t breastfeed me, she said she liked me as a friend.

    My mother had morning sickness after I was born.

    Then later as I was growing up, when I played in the sandbox the cat kept covering me up.

    On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me.

    Boy I was an ugly kid. I had plenty of pimples, one day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face.

    I met the surgeon general, he gave me a cigarette.

    Then I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie.

    I told my doctor I want to get a vasectomy. He told me that with a face like mine, I don’t need one.

    I told my doctor, “Every day I wake up, I look in the mirror, I want to throw up. What’s wrong with me?” He said, “I don’t know, but your eyesight is perfect.

    I tell ya, I know I’m ugly. My proctologist stuck his finger in my mouth.








  • While the dollar amount I suggested is particularly applicable to metro / high col areas, the concept still applies. The same expense/effort on behalf of the driver exists for a $30 delivery as with a $130 delivery.

    The same cannot be said for dine in.

    Flat rate for delivery, percentage based for dine in is a sensible solution which I didn’t come up with myself. More sensible of course is fair pay which negates tipping altogether but we aren’t there yet.

    If small town Indiana is a particularly low cost of living area then maybe $4 is a fair tip. But where I am from, $4 doesn’t last five seconds anymore.

    If it takes them 20 minutes to bring you your pizza, then go back to the shop, then at best they are making $12 per hour minus the mileage and gas and other expenses they incur driving their own vehicle… it’s a real shit job that can only be made better by decent tippers, until such a time comes that tipping is abolished (I won’t hold my breath).





  • I’ll put it this way… for dine in tipping, 20% is fine. If you order a cheap meal by yourself at a restaurant, that $4 tip on a $20 meal is fine. The server probably didn’t have to spend more than a few minutes with you.

    If you are a table of 5 with a bunch of drinks and a $200 tab, the server probably earned their 20% of $40.

    For delivery, a flat rate makes more sense. If someone delivers 3 pizzas and some wings for $100, did that take much more effort than delivering 1 pizza for $20? Same number of steps taken, miles driven, gas used, time used, etc.

    $8 to $10 makes sense for doorstep delivery in todays economy. $5 was fair pre-pandemic.

    If you are getting a whole bunch of stuff delivered then I can see justifying a bigger tip, but probably not percentage based.

    A $4 tip on delivery means the driver is taking a loss or maybe breaking even. They shouldn’t have to suffer because you had a small order.

    The service you receive for delivery is not as directly correlated with the total ticket amount as much as dine in might be.