I'm back on my BS 🤪

I’m back on my bullshit.

  • 32 Posts
  • 366 Comments
Joined 7 months ago
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Cake day: May 28th, 2024

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  • I swear, we are the ultimate scapegoats for bullies. I’ve been going through a similar experience for a while. It’s like people try to find anything that they can criticize and use it to shame me rather than have an open and forthcoming discussion to address it. Being autistic, we’re always guessing how to do things in a world where everyone else knows the rules, which are meant to be followed, and which are meant to be violated.

    Au: You’re violating a rule.

    NT 1: Yeah, but it’s okay. It’s not a big deal because it doesn’t harm anyone and everyone else is doing it.

    Au: violates rule and gets caught because they thought that’s normal and expected

    NT 2: That is a rule. Why did you violate it?

    Au: Because it doesn’t harm anyone and everyone else is doing it

    NT 1 & 2: So now you’re snitching too?

    Here’s another one. You learn a rule and apply it in the situation you learned it. However, you didn’t know it was applicable in other similar situations, so you don’t apply it. People get upset with you because they have seen you apply it in the first situation, so you “should have known” and therefore need to be punished. 😮‍💨

    I don’t care how you walk, talk, or breathe. You be you. Don’t accept other people’s shame being dumped on you. If someone makes you feel bad about yourself, tell them that you don’t like what they do that makes you feel bad. If they keep doing it, stop being around them as much as possible. It’s not your responsibility to help others process their shame. You are your main responsibility and already working with a disadvantage. Make sure you’re okay ❤️




















  • That sucksssss. I remember feeling the zaps for a few nights and feeling entirely disconnected from reality. I couldn’t tell if I was awake or in a dream. I would close my eyes and fantasize about whatever I could to pretend I was somewhere else to ride it out. Then when at work during the day, I was pretending that I wasn’t exhausted from severe lack of sleep. I would have to go to the bathroom to take breaks and recover a little and convince myself everything was okay. I even asked someone I got a long with to make sure I didn’t look weird or did anything stupid.

    Seems like the withdrawal hit you a lot harder than me, so I can’t even imagine how difficult that was to endure.


  • I get that they work and are quite helpful to many people, but I will never take another SSRI in my life again. I hate them things. They make me feel dead. It’s like tricking my mind into pretending everything is okay and jolly by becoming stupid and unaware to the reality of the overall situation. If I feel depressed, it’s for a reason, and the solution is to address that reason, not pretend it doesn’t exist or it’s fine. It’s like if you are in a situation where your leg is broken and can’t heal, would you rather take an opiate to numb the pain or change the situation so your leg can heal? I guess my issue wasn’t necessarily a serotonin imbalance 🤷